Where is my village?

"It takes a village to raise a child."

This old African proverb tells us that in order to raise a child to full maturity, more than just the parents are needed. This sometimes will look like someone stepping in a void if the parent is absent, but culturally it was much more.

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The village was composed of 3 sometimes 4 generations living in close proximity to one another. The people of one village gathered together many times a day to complete tasks, to share resources, and skills. There was a trust and a bond that existed between each of them. In this culture, individuality is celebrated and sought after. We are separated from family and have bought the delusion that knowledge should equate to trustworthiness. In my mind the ideal village is wives having children throughout childbearing years, so yes some 40 year old's having a new born, and siblings being up to 17-20 years apart possibly. This means that the newest young mothers in their early twenties, would have had the opportunity to see their own mother raising children. Naturally as the new mother has questions or life gets on top of her, her own mother is there to give support and encouragement. The image also includes aunts and uncles being in this village, giving their unique perspectives on the same experiences. The sisters would grow up in an environment of similar seasons and could relate to one another in those seasons, much different from their mother because of them going through it around the same time. I'm speaking primarily about early motherhood, but even growing older and physical changes in the older generations. The village would have support for even the oldest in the group with their own sisters and brothers who might have 3 generations following them. Think of the generational wisdom that could put the angst of parents of teenagers, to rest. The skill of peacemaking that only comes with experience, to ease the tension after a disagreement amongst newly weds.

I've been blessed to experience some facets of the village in my life as a new mother. After the LORD moved us back to Oklahoma is when we conceived. Daily we are able to be in a close proximity to both my parents, my brother and sister-in-love and their two kids. On a weekly basis we get to see my mother-in-love, and all of David's siblings. At least every 2 weeks we have the opportunity to physically see or chat with my aunt and uncle, my sweet cousin (who was also a new momma again, at the same time as me!) and her family. So we live very close and our hearts are close to one another. So as a new expectant mother, I would have questions. I could take those questions to my village. Many times I got stories, other times I got warnings, but every time I got encouraging support from people who I could really trust.

Now what does this have to do with God, Church, Christians in general? I'm glad you asked.

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The local church is your village.

The whole thing that started this message was this scripture in Acts.

Section Title: The Fellowship of the Believers

Acts 2:42-27

⁴² And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. ⁴³ And awe^[d] came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. ⁴⁴ And all who believed were together and had all things in common. ⁴⁵ And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. ⁴⁶ And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, ⁴⁷ praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.

This "all things in common" is another way to describe unity.

Just as the young new mother goes to her mother, grand mother, or possibly great grand mother for guidance in navigating changes in her new role; the new Christian should be able to go to a spiritual mother, grandmother, or great grandmother for guidance in this new life with Christ. This metaphor doesn't just apply to women, but men also. Both men and women need to have leaders around to learn from, ones with more experience, more scrapes and scars to tell us where the pitfalls are, where the silver lining is in tough seasons. If the church isn't a place to find this village then the default option is the world.

Why do we think the scripture in Proverbs 22, "⁶ Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." only applies to natural birth kids. All who come to know Christ are spiritually reborn into infancy. We have to be raised up in the teachings that are to renew our minds. Now this is why it takes a village, because not a single one of us have fully grown up in every area. We might look like old wrinkly, gray haired, wise eyed individuals in the area of forgiveness but still be filling up a diaper concerning pride. No not one has arrived, but Christ has promised to mature us. It just doesn't have to start the day we step into heaven, it can start today.

• Someone in your village has walked in our shoes in some way or fashion. We have accepted the dividing lie that our situation is unique. There is nothing new under the sun. Fight for unity by realizing we are all more similar than we like to acknowledge.

  
  

•  I don't see all sides or perspectives, outcomes or holdups in life. The Holy Spirit does, but we are too often pushed by fear to act quickly with the little information we have. The village provides wisdom in times of uncertainty. I have recently experienced this benefit. I was getting tired of waiting on direction so I called on my village. The comforting advice I needed to hear, gave me the standing power to wait a little longer until the breakthrough came.

  
  

• Lending language. In your village, God has placed people there who can lend you language in prayer. It's not them just praying for you, but it a growing opportunity to dig deep and find the words for next time.